Thank you Linar

Last year I went to every resource I could think of, including the ones you suggested. I spent many hours trying to get help. I have found many gross injustices in the law (not just family law) which has left many other people in shocking situations, not just myself so my "digging" has revealed much.

Lawyers are very expensive & require an upfront fee. My ex has left us purposely in a very hard place financially so that is not an option & legal aid has refused to fund me (because of the equity in my home that I cannot access). Ridiculous isn't it?

The family court can rule on a lot of this but again I need legal advice as he has refused to settle in the family court. He would now be in non compliance because I started the process of settlement a year ago (when I had a lawyer). However I do not have one now due to lack of funds & the then family lawyer milked me for what he could & did nothing (leaving me with another huge debt that they sued me for). The American model seems a more beneficial system (for us, not so much for them) as what I can glean they only get paid on a win (I think this may only be for family law, not 100% on this). It might make them try harder for their $$$$! Anyway something constructive needs to be done with the legal system in Australia as the law seems to be written by lawyers for lawyers. I found it very hard & complex trying to represent myself.

Also because this could drag on if my ex refuses to come to any kind of agreement, I have found that lawyers are reticent in taking some of the equity as payment on settlement (which would be my only option for payment at this stage). However if it did drag on, then I could lose all the equity to the lawyers so I may as well just walk out & save myself all the hassle & grief (it seems easier)!

I was advised last year not to talk to my ex anymore because he can be very agressive, manipulative & vintictive, which I now do not do & I also ignore his e-mails. I had a "moment" where I thought he would actually care enough about his children to work out an agreement for settlement.

I do not know why he is being like this because he seems to have everything he wants in life. Freedom to do what he likes when he likes with no responsibilities, a 200k + a year income (so he can also afford the lawyers), company paid accomodation, company paid new car + free fuel, a girlfriend who owns her own home & earns nearly as much as he does.

I am not asking anything from him so what is his problem? All I want is to be left alone to get on with my life & be able to use the equity in my house to invest to support my children & myself. He has already stated in an e-mail that the caveat wasn't for money but to control where I lived!

I am also studying so that I can earn a reasonable income but it all takes time. In the meantime I am locked into a high mortgage with no income. Fun!

I guess another option is that I could rent the house out & get someone else to pay the mortgage. Only problem with that is that I could lose it in the family court (if we ever get there) to the ex (or most of it) as it would then be an IP instead of our family home.

I am also looking at as many sources of income I can find, including online so if anyone has any worthwhile leads, please let me know. This seems to be the best option.

I should thank my ex really because I have grown so much as a person because of all that I have gone through over the past 2 years (so much more than what I am willing to put into a public forum). I have learnt alot too.

I do not mind working hard or doing further study to get us ahead. I will do whatever it takes. I am well past feeling sorry for myself, I hold no grudges, I just need answers.

Maybe I could write a book! There is another source of income, lol!

When I first found out about the caveat I could not believe that anyone can place a caveat on anyone's property for any reason. The law is all wrong here. If they are going to make it that easy to put on, then there should also be a system in place for compulsory mediation where a settlement can be worked out between the parties, then made into a court order without anyone having to go to court & especially no lawyers because in the end it is only the lawyers that win! A time limit on caveats would be a good idea as well because as far as I am aware, there is none at this time.